I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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