It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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