I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
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