There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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