I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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