and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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