I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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