maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Randomize
