i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
