dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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