I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
