i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize
