I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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