I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
