Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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