How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize