He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
