Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
