North Korea, Best Korea!
Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
