Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I can feel your judgement through the phone
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
