Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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