He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
