I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
