How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize