so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
