Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize
