Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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