you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
