yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
