I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I need to calm my uterus...
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
