I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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