You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I am midnight drunk by noon
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
He passed out mid-signature
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
