Betty ford says i'm here all night
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
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