:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
