i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
