In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
