how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
