A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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