it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
