i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize