i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
