Banned from zoo.
Again?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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