I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
there is puke in my bra ... again
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