ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
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