i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
