Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
do nipples grow back?
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