Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
