I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
