in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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