Nicole vs. Life
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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