Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
